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1. Leave the copy machine set to reduce 200%, extra dark, 17 inch paper, 99 copies.
2. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sexual favors."
3. Specify that your drive-through order is "TO-GO."
4. If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.
5. Stomp on little plastic ketchup packets. Gamera and I were pros at this one.
6. Insist on keeping your car windshield wipers running in all weather conditions "to keep them tuned up."
7. Reply to everything someone says with "that's what you think."
8. Practice making fax and modem noises.
9. Highlight irrelevant information in technical papers and "cc" them to your boss.
10. Make beeping noises when a large person backs up. Hey! That's not nice! ;-)
11. Finish all your sentences with the words "in accordance with prophesy."
12. Signal that a conversation is over by clamping your hands over your ears and grimacing.
13. Disassemble your pen and "accidentally" flip the ink cartridge across the room. Been there, done that.
14. Holler random numbers while someone is counting.
15. Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way."
16. Staple pages in the middle of the page.
17. Publicly investigate just how slowly you can make a croaking noise.
18. Honk and wave to strangers.
19. Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complimentary mints at the cash register.
20. TYPE IN UPPERCASE.
21. type only in lowercase.
22. dont use any punctuation either
23. Buy a large quantity of orange traffic cones and reroute whole streets.
24. Repeat the following conversation a dozen times.
"DO YOU HEAR THAT?"
"What?"
"Never mind, it's gone now."
25. As much as possible, skip rather than walk.
26. Try playing the William Tell Overture by tapping on the bottom of your chin. When nearly done, announce "No, wait, I messed it up," and repeat.
27. Ask people what gender they are.
28. While making presentations, occasionally bob your head like a parakeet.
29. Sit in your front yard pointing a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down. I use a green laser. It works!
30. Sing along at the opera. I WILL NOT GET STUCK AT AN OPERA TO TRY THIS ONE!
31. Go to a poetry recital and ask why each poem doesn't rhyme.
32. Ask your co-workers mysterious questions and then scribble their answers in a notebook. Mutter something about "psychological profiles."
33. And last but not least, center all of the text on a really long list of ways to tick people off so that it's difficult to read. ;-)

Click to see all 21...

Some of these had so much potential. Why can't they have made Judge Dread with someone other than Stallone!? Shit, it would have been better with Tom Cruise for shits sake.

Top 10 Signs You're Flat Broke

1. American Express calls and says: "Leave home without it!"

2. You wash your toilet paper

3. You're formulating a plan to rob the food bank.

4. You've rolled so many pennies, you've formed a psychic bond with Abe Lincoln.

5. Long distance companies don't call you to switch anymore.

5. You look at your roommate and see a large fried chicken in tennis shoes.

6. At communion you go back for seconds.

7. You finally clean your house, hoping to find change.

8. You think of a lottery ticket as an investment.

9. You give blood everyday... just for the orange juice.

10. McDonald's supplies you with all your kitchen condiments.

Honorable Signs:

Your idea of a 7-course meal is taking a deep breath outside a restaurant.
You have to save up to be poor.
You're in college.
You owe yourself money.
Your imaginary friend has more money than you.
On thanksgiving your dad would bring home a picture of a thanksgiving meal.
You are sterilizing your urine for reconsumption.
Your rob Peter... and then rob Paul.

Post yours in the comments section.

I haven't seen a lot of these movies, but I printed the entire list and plan to watch them all now. The one thing I noticed is that there are VERY few comedies on the list. I think 3 of my top 10 were mentioned. How the hell is FRANKENSTEIN listed, that was isn't a movie you can watch over and over. I would have loved to see Rambo on there...

The Top Ten:

1. CITIZEN KANE (1941)

2. CASABLANCA (1942)

3. THE GODFATHER (1972)

4. GONE WITH THE WIND (1939)

5. LAWRENCE OF ARABIA (1962)

6. THE WIZARD OF OZ (1939)

7. THE GRADUATE (1967)

8. ON THE WATERFRONT (1954)

9. SCHINDLER'S LIST (1993)

10. SINGIN' IN THE RAIN (1952)

Click here for the rest of the list...

Top 10's are often not very accurate since we all have different tastes, like i found a Top 100 Guitar Hero list that had Eddie Van Halen at # 70...wtf ! anyways...I was surprised to see MY #1 War Movie is actually Number one on that list too ! Too bad they didnt include BAND OF BROTHERS ( http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0185906/ ), I know it's a miniserie not a movie,still, it's the best WWII "Movie" Ever...If you still haven't seen it, Go rent/buy/download/borrow/steal it already !

TOP 10 WAR MOVIES http://ca.askmen.com/toys/top_10_60/83_top_10_list.html

This is a BOX OFFICE worst list, meaning the ones that didnt make enough money to even pay back the costs of making the movie. So if your Worst Movie Ever isnt on this list, let us know what it is.

http://www.virgin.net/movies/toptens/boxofficeflops.html

Popular Science magazine has once again published their Top 10 Worst Jobs in Science List.
I don't know........ some of them sound better than my job as a computer programmer.

Click here to see all 40.
I always liked the naked pregnant Demi Moore on Vanity Fair myself.

U-Haul, celebrating 60 years of serving the do-it-yourself household moving industry, today released results of the 2004 U-Haul National Migration Trend Report titled Top 50 U.S. Destination Cities Report. According to moving data reflective of nationwide statistics for calendar year 2004, Chicago takes the No. 1 spot pushing Atlanta out of its four-year pole position, while Orlando, Fla. attained the second position. Los Angeles, Calif. moved to No. 3, up from No. 10 from last year's ranking. Houston garnered fourth down one spot from last year's ranking and Sacramento, Calif. followed with fifth place. Atlanta, New York, Denver, Las Vegas and Dallas rounded out the top 10.

NOTE: I intentionally left out kid movies and chick flicks for the most part. Otherwise I would have been trying to work this out for weeks...